I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Randomize
