Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
You ruined the universe
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
