i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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