I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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