Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
