There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
