My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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