farters have to be the big spoon...
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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