well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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