We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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