i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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