i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Please, let me fuck your mom
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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