Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize