ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
