Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize