zippers are such a cool invention
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
