Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
