I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Randomize
