Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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