if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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