you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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