College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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