He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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