Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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