So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
