I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
As shirtless as possible
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
