It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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