Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
