I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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