also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
