So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
