I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
