so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
