Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
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