I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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