ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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