Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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