One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Drunk walkin through police station. America
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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