I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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