There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize