so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
