margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize