It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
