What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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