He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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