i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
