i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
