eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
