Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize