the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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